Oh The Places (in Scotland) I've Been

Congratulations! Today is the day!
I'm writing of places
I've been while away.

I had brains in my head,
And a hole in my shoes,
And a magical railpass,
And a wish to buy booze.
I was all on my own. And you know what? I know
That traveling alone ain't the best way to go.

But it worked out alright. I made sure to take care.
And whenever I saw castles? I blew all my quid there.
At the fortress at Stirling I admired the view,
posed with Will Wallace, and tried Iron Bru.

And I saw lots of tracksuits,
and sketchy street bands.
There were Team Cullen t-shirts,
some crass wrestling ads.

But there were mountains there,
with that sweet mountain air.

Oh!
The Places I've Been!

I worked on my way up
to Aberdeen for a night
to see a folk concert,
and man, it was tight.

Aberdeen's, like, a square of depressing grey blocks.
American-born, I feared there'd be knocks
wherever I saw a big bloke in a hood,
but everyone's sweet, and the music was good.

Oh, yes, there were sheep.
Aberdeen's known for sheep.

Glasgow has shops
in every spot that you look,
and fresh sushi to boot,
even bought me some books!

Not as much archetecture of the Georgian style,
But we can't all be Edinburgh and have a Royal Mile.
I went into Ladbroks while waiting for my train,
won six pounds at blackjack, yet felt oddly shamed.

Now, I'm happy to say,
and really it's true,
that seeing the Highlands
can kind of change you.

You can't picture this stuff.
A photo won't do.
For in that wide expanse
you affix part of you.

You will come to a place where the signed are not marked
in English, but Gaelic, and nothing seems dark
in the world anymore,
where mountains hug Morrisons
(a grocery store).
If you backpack the trails,
I didn't have time,
you'll certainly find
the great peaks worth the climb.

I hung 'round Fort William,
and walked by the river.
It was beautiful, cold, but I didn't shiver.
The West Coast of Scotland is hype that delivers,
although the whiskey I tried there played hell with my liver.

But I found myself campsick,
at the end of the day.
Do these hills beat the Blue Ridge?
I can't really say.

Now I'm gone to Carolina
and Glen Nevis' stones,
and Albany Park,
And they all feel like home.

So...
since I've got Catullus, and Sardis, and pray,
I work the crusades some point on the way,
These are the places
I'll write of today.
I'm bound for the Union.
So be on your way.